I am tired of scientific findings.  Every now and then theres some ominous danger lurking behind something I enjoy doing and then afew months or even years later they will tell me, “oh never mind thats not really harmful” I mean wtf? They will also tell you that certain things are of great benefit to your health and general well being so I spend my precious time trying these noble ideas and then 5 years later they tell me, “oh, according to recent findings, jogging everyday is detrimental to your knees..” Crap! How will I reclaim those wasted years being careful to avoid something I actually enjoyed or reluctantly practising a behaviour I detested in order to stay fresh? . I am tempted not to listen to them but then again you do not know when they might be right. Granted some things like smoking there’s no doubt that all those carcinogens could cause fatal illnesses but when you tell me that my cellphone will cause cancer of the brain and then later you tell me that theres no actual evidence of that, you are just pissing me off. I am not against science or research with a goal to try and cure some of these killer diseases, I just wonder if the money spent studying the benefits of eating fish might be better spent looking of a HIV vaccine.  Speaking of fish, turns out that eating fish doesn’t really help in better brain development. Shocking!  Scientists have recently ‘discovered’ that there’s no extra benefits gained from an intensive fish diet. Why the hell did they make me annoy my roommates and workmates with that irritating pungent and smelly fish for all those years? I remember back in college, my dorm room stank of omena (a small 2-inch long fish found in Lake Victoria in Western Kenya). My 24/7 quest to be smarter by combining studies with a relentless omena eating habit, almost made me an outcast. And then I read in the paper yesterday that fish doesn’t really improve brain development, are you kidding me?  The feeling I equate to that is the disappointment and anger I felt when I slowly discovered that the religious upbringing I went through was based on myth and unproven facts. Theres so many things I could have tried and enjoyed if i didn’t have the fear that God is watching. I am still trying to catch up on some things just to revenge on those days I had to live a pure life so I can be the Papa’s good boy,but thats a story for another day. I have henceforth decided that if something makes my life better in my own “unlearned” judgement, then I will do it with the zest of a kid who has just learnt how to walk. Bring on those mashed potatoes with a roasted fat goat and afew beers to boot. Let’s enjoy this ride because after all we are all heading to the same place, aren’t we?

If you think of the word lost,it could have lots of meanings. One could be lost in their thoughts, sense of direction, reality,  and all sorts of loss of bearing. However the being lost from yourself could be the greatest of all losses. Because it doesn’t matter who you are but who you believe yourself to be. You could be the smartest person in the world but if you think you are an imbecile,then thats exactly what you are. The mind is the strongest most guiding factor in who we ultimately become. To be a master of your own destiny requires a strong mind, one that never for a moment lets the circumstances change how you think about yourself. I for example am not the smartest person in the world but I know for sure that if you ask me how I got here and why I am typing this at  3 am in the morning, I would tell you that I have control of my mind, but do I? Well,you might say its debatable if you know me or you are not familiar with me enough to decide, but for me I KNOW I do. I realise that the grandiosity of that statement might be a turn off for some but its just the plain truth. I can eat shit out of a toilet and not even heave and at the same moment I have this believe in my head that I can’t let a snake in my sight…it’s all in the mind and i know if i was to fall in a ditch full of snakes, I would still come out alive. What am I saying here? I am simply stating  that to be who you wanna be is a very conflicting ideal,because you can’t always be who you are but also u can’t lose yourself otherwise you will never recognise who you were to begin with. All you can do is try is to be you, and hope others recognise it as not an overblown ego but an expression of individuality that makes us all unique. This world has got lots of distractions that make us stray from the real persons that we were born to be. We have become ‘actors’ in a movie that the director never says cut and we end up overplaying our roles and therefore losing ourselves in those roles. If you doubt that you are an actor in the movie of life then listen to yourself the next time you talk to your boss or your parent or your spouse. That’s not you. And thats OK because thats what life has taught us and you gotta do what you gotta do to stay in the game. However when you are alone sitting in the dark or on a sleepless night who are you to yourself? Are you lost to yourself?

In 1981, Ricky Ray Rector asked the prison guards not to remove the dishes from his last supper, because he would want his dessert when he returned. Not comprehending the full extent of his punishment, Ricky was executed by lethal injection. Would you execute a convict who cannot establish the difference between reality and fantasy? We all want to be treated equally—despite our unique essence—so we migrate to a land that provokes monotonous justice. We leave behind “an eye for an eye” judicial system, only to find exceptions made toward minorities when it comes to the same crimes. Due to the discrepancies between written laws and its actions; and an opinionated declaration of the afterlife; capital punishment should be illegal in United States. 

It should be unacceptable that while the law states otherwise, its actions are carried out differently. The Eighth Amendment states that cruel and unusual punishments should not be inflicted. Its definition is clear, but its connotation allows each state to define its own level of “cruelty”. No burning, no stoning, no gas, no minor, no retarded, why are criminals classified for the same crime committed? Capital punishment is in fact killing an individual—regardless of their malicious deeds. Is it not hypocrisy to possess a method that is: you murder him; therefore we are going to murder you? Some crimes committed are so inhumane that our first emotion is rage and disgust that this monster is still allowed to live. “The death penalty, in other words, is predicated on the idea that the primary goal of justice is revenge. But revenge is not law; it is derived from emotion rather than principle, and justice is by definition a principle blind to emotion” (Manville). The fear that a convict will commit the same crime again once out on parole (which was proved in some cases) is the main reason why capital punishment still has voters. The solution is: no parole. If one is sentenced for life, life is neither 10 years nor is it 20 years, life is until one dies. Life without parole, education, or special treatments is the answer not only in making sure that the wrong individual convicted is not mistakenly murdered, but also the criminal is not released to harm again.

The concept that a criminal should be killed to suffer is based on an opinionated belief that life after death would in fact offer them the punishment they rightly deserve. 

If one of the purposes of punishment is to punish wrongdoing individuals, where is the punishment in permanently removing them? Sure they won’t be slaughtering again, but where is the justice in that? Not every American believes in the afterlife, and if America’s first amendment is freedom of religion, why is only one belief being practice? No qualms that certain people deserved to be permanently removed—but it is not up to them to play ‘God’. Life is not theirs to give nor is it theirs to take—because that’s exactly what criminals are doing. Capital punishment supporters say it’s for the best, by killing one, they’ll be saving five, that ‘the end justifies the means’. If this is the case than half of its population should be either locked up or killed, no exceptions!

A country that states and carries and bases some of its laws on opinions rather than facts need to revise its governmental structure. Crimes should neither be excusable nor go unpunished. If the same crime is committed, then the punishment needs to be the same throughout each state. Capital punishment is ineffective because life after death is unknown and criminals are not afraid of dying, otherwise the rates would decrease. Crimes will always surround us since it has been doing so before Christ. The money used for death row criminals needs to be spent educating prospects criminals about moral conduct. Convicts’ sentences for life need to mentally and socially suffer for ‘life’ living with the knowledge that they took another life—now that’s punishment. Nothing sinks better into the depth of darkness in our mind than guilt and regret.